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Sunday 31 July 2011

Puppy School-The Real Truth




So here we are, half way through a six week puppy training course.  Four dogs in all.  A very snobby poodle (with an even snobbier owner with a very bad perm)...a tiny little shitshu-havanese mix that barely reaches the ankles on my 5'4" frame (Her owner is a very lovely older lady who, in my opinion was probably a doggie-doormat in her previous life), and lastly, a very adorable bulldog (with a young married couple as owners).   All of us owners have never, ever had a dog before.  We've bonded!!

My little puppy has been passing with flying colours so far.  He sits when told, stays, lies down and walks fantastically. He is the star of the school.  That is...until I noticed that he never stares at the teacher...just keeps looking at his lord and master!!  Who is this lord and master?  Let me back up a bit..just to give my faithful readers full understanding into my puppy's psyche.  There are 3 humans in my family.  There's me, "the human chew-toy"...there's my 14-year old son "second in command." ( That kid will not take any poop from our puppy)....and lastly, there is my husband.  An ordinary fellow, nice, kind, good husband...but none of that means anything to pup.  My husband, the only member of the family that does not particularly care for the dog..my husband, who 2-3 times a week threatens to give back our little guy...my husband, who has no emotional attachment to the pup has somehow become our dog's reason for living.  When the pup sees him in the morning, he lights up.  My husband has become the pup's reason for living...the sun, moon, stars all revolve around hubby.  Pup eagerly awaits hubby every morning...will stop halfway through eating just to make sure his lord and master is alright.  In short, somehow, my seemingly ordinary husband has become the air in my pup's lungs..the beat in his heart...the blood in his veins.

So now, back to puppy school...Pup behaves like an angel.  But, yesterday I noticed that he only looks at hubby when in class.  To prove my point, I suggested that hubby leave the room.  There I was, with other doggies and trainers in the room, holding pup's leash, when hubby got up and left.  In the nano-second it took for the door to close behind him, pup had the leash in his mouth, facing me with shoulders squared , feet planted firmly on the ground, and growling at me.  An Olympian would kill for that kind of time!!!!  "Use the leash to correct him" the instructor would say.  I couldn't find the leash!!!  He had it so tightly grasped in his jaws that I couldn't find any "give" so I could hold the leash.  I just dropped it and watched helplessly as my dog turned his back to me.  My son started saying something about the dog not respecting me...the other owners gave me smug looks knowing their pups weren't so bad after all...the teacher tried to give me some reasurrance that all I had to do was make the dog understand that I was the boss....but the truth was, pup knows who the boss is.  His lord and master...his bright light in the sky....laughing hysterically at me through the window!!!!!


For more blogs, please visit http://cluelesspuppyowner.blogspot.com/ and http://thecluelesspuppyowner.blogspot.com/

Wednesday 27 July 2011

10 things I've learnt in the 8 weeks since becoming a puppy owner

Hello and welcome to CluelessPuppy's 1st blog.

Never having had a dog before, I was in for a real treat!!!  I had heard that Portuguese Water Dogs were warm, loving and easy to train.  Hmmm, I should have listened to the warnings of my friends.  It wasn't so much the words...as the tone in which they said seemingly innocent statements:

Me: "I'm geting an 8 week old puppy"
1st Friend: "Oh....you're getting a puppy puppy"
Me: "Huh?"

Me: "I'm getting an 8 week old puppy"
2nd Friend: "Oh...why not get a 9 month old instead?"
Me: "Huh?"

I should have listened.

Well, it's been 8 weeks now and these are the 10 things I've learned since becoming a puppy owner:

1. Apparently, it's OK to bite the hand that feeds you (repeatedly).
2. The size of the dog is not proportional to the size of the poop.
3. Puppies are never finished pooping when you think they are.
4. A 4 month old puppy can go through 4 leashes in 8 weeks.
5. A puppy will follow you around for about 40 minutes till feeding time.
6. Puppies are smarter than most MENSA members.
7. It takes 3 family members to tire out 1 puppy.
8. Puppies are fearless...especially when it comes to adult German Shepards, Pitbulls, and Berneses
9. Puppies are cute on purpose...it keeps them alive.
10. Pecking order in my home..Husband/14 year old son/4 month old puppy/ME!!

Still, I love the little guy!!  He makes me feel...Oops, gotta go...someone wants out NOW!!!

For more blogs, please visit http://cluelesspuppyowner.blogspot.com/ and http://thecluelesspuppyowner.blogspot.com/